I've Started to Notice Changes

If You Have Noticed Changes in Memory or Thinking

If you have started noticing changes in your own memory or thinking, or changes in someone close to you, it can be hard to know what to make of them. You might wonder whether it is just a bad day, part of getting older, or something that should be looked into further.

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You do not need to work this out on your own.

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A good place to start is simply to notice what has changed, how often it is happening, and whether it is beginning to affect everyday life.

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What have you noticed?

If you are thinking about yourself, ask whether there are things that feel noticeably harder than they used to.

If you are concerned about someone else, think about whether you have noticed a change from how they would normally manage.

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This might include:

• forgetting recent conversations or appointments

• missing medication or becoming unsure whether it was taken

• paying bills twice or finding money harder to manage

• getting confused during familiar activities

• finding cooking, shopping or using technology more difficult

• struggling to follow conversations

• having more difficulty finding the way around familiar places

• finding it harder to organise, plan or make decisions

• making decisions that seem unusual or out of character

• needing more help with things that were previously managed independently

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You may notice these changes yourself before anyone else does.

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For example, you might find that you are checking things repeatedly, relying on reminders more often, losing track of what you were doing or needing much more concentration to complete familiar activities. That does not automatically mean that something serious is wrong. One mistake or difficult day on its own may not mean very much. It is usually the pattern over time that gives a clearer picture.

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For example, instead of thinking:

“Dad's memory is getting worse.”

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it is more useful to notice:

“Dad has forgotten his evening tablets three times this week, even though he used to manage them himself.”

 

Or, if you are noticing changes in yourself:

“I have missed two appointments this month, even though I have always managed my diary without difficulty.”

 

Specific examples can make it much easier to understand what is actually changing.

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Think about what else is going on

Memory and thinking can be affected by many things.

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You or the person you are concerned about may struggle more when:

• tired

• sleeping poorly

• in pain

• physically unwell

• stressed, worried or low in mood

• taking new or different medication

• rushed

• trying to do several things at once

• somewhere noisy, busy or unfamiliar

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Vision and hearing are important too. Learn more about those by clicking here. 

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Someone who has not heard information properly may appear forgetful because they never clearly heard it in the first place. Poor vision can also make everyday activities harder. Reading medication labels, finding objects, navigating unfamiliar places or following written instructions may all require more effort.

 

It can be helpful to notice when things go better too. Do you or the person you are concerned about manage better:

• earlier in the day?

• somewhere quiet?

• when given more time?

• with a written reminder?

• when things are kept in the same place?

• when there is only one thing to concentrate on at a time?

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These small clues can sometimes point towards simple ways of making everyday life easier.

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Keep a few examples

If you are unsure whether there really is a pattern, keep a short note of the things you notice. You do not need to monitor everything.

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Simply note:

What happened?

Has it happened before?

Was this different from how things would normally be managed?

Did it affect everyday life or safety?

Was there anything that seemed to make it better or worse?

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If you are noticing changes in yourself, keeping a few examples can also be useful because it can be difficult to remember exactly what happened when you later speak to a healthcare professional.

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A few clear examples are usually much more helpful than simply saying, “My memory isn't as good as it used to be.”

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When should I talk to the GP?

It is worth asking for advice if changes in memory or thinking:

• keep happening

• are becoming more noticeable

• feel clearly different from how you or the person used to manage

• are affecting everyday activities

• mean more help or reminders are needed

• are making familiar activities noticeably harder

• are causing concern about safety

• are worrying you, even if you are not sure exactly what is happening

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You do not need to wait until things become very difficult before asking for help. If you yourself have noticed a change, it is reasonable to speak to your GP even if family or friends have not noticed anything.

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You know what is normal for you. A change that feels significant to you is worth mentioning. Similarly, if you are concerned about someone close to you, try to focus on specific changes you have noticed rather than trying to diagnose what they mean.

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What happens if the GP wants to look into it further?

If the GP feels that more assessment would be helpful, they may carry out some initial checks, organise further tests or refer you or the person you are concerned about to another healthcare professional or specialist service.

 

This does not automatically mean dementia.

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There are many possible reasons why memory or thinking may change, and assessment is about trying to understand the whole picture. Being referred for an assessment also does not mean someone is being sent to a nursing home. The aim is to understand what is happening and to identify anything that could help the person continue managing everyday life as well as possible. Depending on what is needed and what services are available locally, different healthcare professionals may be involved.

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A Geriatrician

A geriatrician is a doctor who specialises in the health of older people. They may look at the bigger picture, including general health, medication and whether there are medical factors that could be contributing to changes in memory, thinking or everyday function.

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An Occupational Therapist

An occupational therapist may look at how memory and thinking are affecting real everyday activities.

 

This might include:

• managing a daily routine

• preparing meals

• taking medication

• shopping

• managing household activities

• using a phone or other technology

• getting around safely

• organising appointments

• managing other activities that are important to the person

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An OT may look not only at what someone finds difficult, but also why the activity has become difficult and what might make it easier. This could involve changing the activity, simplifying a routine, using prompts or reminders, adapting the home environment or finding another way of completing the task.

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The aim is to support independence rather than automatically taking activities away.

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Other healthcare professionals

Other healthcare professionals may also be involved depending on what support is needed.

This might include help with:

• mobility and balance

• communication

• mood or emotional wellbeing

• hearing or vision

• medication

• nutrition

• other health concerns

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The aim is to help the person keep living their life

Having an assessment does not mean that someone has suddenly been judged unable to live independently.

Often the purpose is quite the opposite. It is about understanding what has changed and seeing whether there are ways to make everyday life easier, safer and more manageable.

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That might involve:

• making a routine simpler

• using reminders

• keeping important items in consistent places

• changing how an activity is done

• reducing distractions

• improving hearing or vision support

• making small changes at home

• treating another health problem

• putting a little extra support in place

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If you are the person experiencing the changes, you should remain involved in decisions about what support would be useful to you. Needing a reminder, changing how you do something or accepting some help does not mean losing control over your life. Sometimes people's needs do become more complex over time and different options may eventually need to be discussed.

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But asking for help with changes in memory or thinking does not put someone on a path towards residential care.

Getting advice early can help you and your family understand what is happening, make practical changes and find the right support while you are still managing many things for yourself.

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